Round 9

[porsche]

This is the saddest I've been to make final 5. Before the round, I was feeling hyped up. I made a list of plans, I figured out who would put up who and I was eager to get the round started. I wanted Cody out and I thought I had positioned myself really well.

And then the round actually happened. I wanted Cody out but when he won veto, I settled for taking out Louise. And...she did not take it well to say the least. I was questioning her earlier but she sounded crushed when I voted her out. She said she would have chosen me over Cody which I didn't believe but she sounded really genuine and hurt and I just feel like shit. I always loved her, but I felt like I wasn't her priority and her closeness to Cody made her a target I could settle for.

But just like Will, I guess I underestimated Louise's closeness to me. I don't even know what I'm doing now. I made a big move to take out someone who I guess had my back, Sarah is pissed at me for not telling her about my veto, Cody is targeting me when last round I heard that he actually wasn't going to put me up, and now David is convinced me and Austin are a pair which, well, I guess we are.

I thought I would be a lot happier making it this far (and being the only player to have never been nominated!) but right now I just feel depressed. If I had gotten Cody out I would have probably wanted to take Louise to at least the final 3, but now she feels betrayed and I hate that I was the one to do this to her.

[Kat]

Keep your head up Porsche!

[Ika]

Just stop your doing great
You had to save your boy's



Good luck w hoh

[porsche]

I'm feeling a little better. It's just a game and I can't bring everyone to the end. It's going to hurt a lot the next time I hear from Louise though. Even accidentally voting her out in Dicevivor was too much. I wouldn't say that I'm over it, but I think I've managed to get my head back in the game.

Did I even make the right call. It's very frustrating because when I took that shot, I wanted it to hit Cody and not Louise. If anybody but Cody won that veto, he was going up and out. Well, if Sarah won it would depend on whether she would nominate Cody or Louise, and if Austin or David won then it would be Sarah's choice if I was the renom. But still, I've wanted Cody out bad since the final 9, and here he is. If Cody left without me having to use my veto, I would have Austin and David on one side, and Sarah and Louise on the other. Sarah would still trust me and Louise supposedly would have turned on Sarah before me. Louise also claimed she would choose me over Cody because she knew she would lose to Cody. She's also telling me David will side with Cody. Do I believe her? I don't know!

If this was the truth, then I really wish I had known sooner. Because it was a fast forward round, I cast my vote as she was campaigning to me, and that stung even more when she realized that. That was a mistake on my part but fast forwards are awful places for campaigning or jury management. If I really was in her final 2 plans though, why didn't she tell me? I knew that if David left, Cody wouldn't put up Sarah or Louise, which would mean I would be nominated. I knew Louise was going after David but with him gone, who would she nominate? Austin would be one, I didn't think she would put up Cody, and it would be between me and Sarah and since she seemed comfortable with Sarah and never said a word about turning on her, I assumed it would be me.

I actually agree with Louise about David. He has been far from trustworthy lately. I asked him about what Mark had said and he kind of deflected it:

Porsche Briggs (21:47:32): oh real quick, before the round starts there was just something Mark brought up to me that I wanted to ask you about
David (21:47:41): Oh good Lord, lol
Porsche Briggs (21:47:53): lol
Porsche Briggs (21:48:08): he tried to say you told him me and Austin are a pair?
David (21:48:27): Austin said the same thing
David (21:48:41): He was really trying to bring me down before he left
Porsche Briggs (21:48:58): yeah, it didn't sound like he liked you
Porsche Briggs (21:49:04): So it didn't happen?
David (21:49:07): I was super mean in my good bye message
David (21:49:28): I said you guys voted together the round that Will left

And then during the FF, I hear from Sarah that David is telling her me and Austin are a pair! I don't trust him at all and I don't like having to rely on him. I did second guess myself after hearing that information but the plan was already set and leaving the potential of a Cody/Louise pair that wanted to work with Sarah was too big of a risk.

Things have been getting really weird now that it's the final 5. And by that, I mean...I haven't spoken with anyone. After I finished talking with Sarah the night after the fast forward, the only conversations I've had was a quick conversation with Austin where he told me there was an issue with the competition and a non-game related chat with Sarah until she disappeared again. That is literally it. Nothing with Cody. Nothing with David.

I don't know. AIM is naturally going to feel more silent when there is 4 people to talk to instead of 13 but this is just a very weird feeling. Every time I look, nobody is online. There's nothing I can do now but wait for people to log on. If nobody is online, at least they're not talking to anyone else, right?

For the next round, the HOH and the veto are so important. The only way I'll feel safe is if me or Austin wins and even then I could be in danger if David wins the veto and flips. I would prefer not to win the final 5 HOH because then I don't get a chance to compete for the final 4 HOH, and I only have one shot to save myself. But the alternative is giving Cody a better chance of winning, and I can't do that. I heard from Sarah that Cody suggested voting me out which I can't really be surprised at after last round. I heard from both Sarah and Louise that Cody planned on putting up Austin and David and if that was still the case, I would consider making David my #1 target but I guess I burnt that bridge. Oops.

If I won HOH, I would put up Cody and Sarah. I would be tempted to do Cody and David but then Sarah could win the veto, pull Cody down. Then Austin is out, I can't compete for final 4 HOH and I'm probably out unless I win the veto. I need to talk to David though and see where his head is at. That's twice he's called me and Austin a pair and I'm worried he could see this round as a great time to flip. I probably should have used the veto on him instead of Austin just to keep him happy. I'd even make a final 2 with him if that's what it took, even though I don't intend to keep it.

If Cody is safe, or if Cody is gone, then I want David out. He's too good in competitions, too shady, and I assume he's too big of a jury threat.

[porsche]

AHHH I WAS 80% DONE WITH MY PUZZLE AND PRESSED THE BACK BUTTON AND I LOST ALL MY WORK

I think I had already passed Cody's time so it wouldn't have changed anything but still, really frustrating. I was feeling good as long as anybody but Cody became HOH, so of course Cody won. Will I ever be able to get this guy out? He was going home at the final 8 before Sarah pulled out the DPOV, he's been a huge target ever since and somehow he made it to the final 4.

Based on what Sarah said the last time I had a game talk with her (two days ago) she said Cody was talking about targeting me. When he won I was expecting to go up. I asked him who his nominations were going to be, expecting to be one of them, but then he told me he would be putting up David and Austin because they nominated him. So now I've made it this far without ever being nominated! To be fair, this is probably because of Sarah's influence and my failure in competitions, but still.

This shows that I made a good decision in sticking to my guns and voting out Louise. It hurt A LOT to do it, but if she was still here and David wasn't, I would be on the block in David's place.

So where does the week go from here? If Sarah or Cody win, they won't use it and Austin will probably go, though I'll at least try to change their mind. If Austin wins, he takes himself off, I go up, and I think he and Sarah would keep me over David. If David wins, I go up in his place. Sarah keeps me over Austin and if it comes to a tiebreaker, I think Cody would keep me, based on these nominations. So I should be in the final 4 no matter what.

If I win, things get interesting. I would have to use it to take Austin down. I think he makes the most sense as a final 2 partner and I think he's the most loyal to me, and I'm not sure if he would survive if he was on the block. That would leave it as Sarah vs David. I've always thought I would be voting out David and taking Sarah to the final 3 but would that make the most sense strategically? If Cody/Sarah want to take each other to the final 3, that's dangerous. On the other hand, I haven't spoken to David in forever and I have no idea where he stands. I want to believe he's with me and Austin but with the number of times he brought up me and Austin being a pair, he could believe that and try to break it up. I also really do not want to be taken out by David and have Louise say "I told you so!"

I would need to win the veto first. If I don't, the week should be pretty straightforward. And given my track record with competitions, me winning the veto is not likely. If I do, though, I'll make a chart of all the different combinations at the final 4.

[porsche]

I'm getting a weird feeling. I never talk to anyone anymore. When I chat with Austin, Cody or Sarah, it lasts ten minutes at the most before they leave or stop replying. I haven't even talked with David since the fast forward. Austin in particular has been feeling very strange lately. He always seems so stressed and defensive and it isn't fun talking with him at all. Is there something going on in the game that I don't know about? I don't know! I do feel like people are just in a holding pattern waiting for the POV results. Hopefully I won.

[porsche]

Sarah Miller
Because I am a fan of full disclosure, I am just like... I honestly think that as things are you would slaughter everyone left in an F2, me included. And part of me is like, if you had won the PoV, would you have pulled the rug out from under me? I'd like to think you wouldn't have and I guess I'll never know now but I guess it's just paranoia leftover from last round, I don't know. For my game I think the best option for me probably would be to use the veto, but I've played this whole game a certain way and I'm so emotionally invested in you that I can't overcome it and respond entirely logically to the situation

Ugh. If only I was 11 seconds faster in the veto, I would have a guaranteed spot in the final 4 and could decide what happens this week. I was partially right that I needed to be paranoid.

I don't actually think it would be a good move for Sarah to use the veto. I don't actually believe I'm that big of a threat and I want to work with her, unlike David and Austin. And if she needs me out that badly, she can do it later, given my awful challenge record.

[porsche]

Well, I'm in the final 4 now, and I made it that far without being on the block or winning a competition. I now have a final 2 with Sarah. Will I keep it? I don't know! The chat I had with Sarah last night was one of the weirdest ones I've ever had, where she admitted she saw me as a big threat but then said that she's "played this game a certain way" and that "she's so invested in me she can't think logically." And I'm not really sure how to take it. If voting me out was something she considered at final 5, would she consider it again at final 4? Final 3? If David's not around and she thinks she can beat Cody or Austin in the end, will she follow through on taking me to the final 2? I'm not sure. On the other hand, I could look at it like she's committing to taking me to the final 2, even if that's not the best for her. There's also a part of me that's thinking that hey, if she sees me as such a huge threat and thinks I've played a great game, maybe that's somebody I want on the jury.

I was expecting Austin to be going if nominations stayed the same, but Sarah and Cody are both saying they want David out for his challenge strength. Is it a mistake for me to vote him out? If I can trust David to target Sarah and Cody and Sarah/Cody see David as too big of a challenge threat to take to the final 3, nobody wants me out. If it was me vs Austin on the block, you could make the argument that even though I haven't won a competition, I'm more of a challenge threat because I've come very close lately while Austin hasn't even finished. And if I'm as big of a jury threat as Sarah says, the important thing becomes getting to the end, not getting to the end with the right person.

I don't know. I'm not the best at articulating my game. I still think Austin is the best path for me to win. I've had a lot of second place finishes where I took an ally who I thought I could beat and it turned out I was wrong. Against Sarah or Cody, I'm worried they'll start off with three votes already: Mark, Louise and each other. David is a strong player and I don't know if I would beat him.

If I win HOH next, I'm safe no matter what, and as long as me and Austin wins the veto, Cody is out. If Sarah wins HOH, then I need to make sure Cody keeps me over Austin. I want to believe that Austin would vote out Cody over me. If Austin wins HOH and Cody/Sarah wins veto, I'm in trouble. If Sarah wins veto, I at least have a chance of convincing her to keep me but I'm probably going home in that spot.

If David wins HOH, I'm in the exact same spot. David being around and not Austin doesn't make a difference if he's safe. With a Sarah HOH, I trust Austin more with the veto but I think they would both vote out Cody. If Cody or Sarah wins, they're more likely to vote out David but if Cody would still vote out Austin, it wouldn't matter? I need to talk to Cody.

I'm pretty sure I'll be voting out David but I want to at least think about this.